All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
