If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
