Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
