I think I am morally bankrupt
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
