North Korea, Best Korea!
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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