I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
