i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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