It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
