Got a toothbrush?
Do you still have your period?
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
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