I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Randomize
