My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
