so explain again why im purple
no
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
