I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Randomize
