what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
