The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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