You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Randomize
