it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
