I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
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