I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
