He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
