Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
