Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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