Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
