mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
