just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Randomize
