Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
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