He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
God I need to hump something, right now.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
