im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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