So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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