the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize
