Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
he laminated a picture of his dick.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Randomize
