you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Randomize
