Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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