speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize
