You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
