waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
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