I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
