East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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