i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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