just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Pi�atas plus fireworks don't mix well
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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