...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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