so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
