ugly people sure do ruin things
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
