I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
