is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
