I never want to see another naked old woman again.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Randomize
