They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
