How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Randomize
