my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
