I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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